The safe and secure world of a child’s home can suddenly become unpredictable and scary when a parent is diagnosed with and begins to battle cancer. Kids are very in tune with moods and feelings, they can sense stress in the family quickly and often become worried. It is important to talk with them about cancer, give them age-appropriate information and tell them how many people battle cancer and survive. Imagined fears are very often far worse than the reality.
There are a few things to be sure and do when talking to the kids about a parent’s cancer diagnosis. These things can be of help and hopefully make the situation a little less scary for all.
-Use the word “cancer” to explain the illness, and tell where the cancer is located.
-Encourage questions but do not force the issue. Have meals together, spend time watching movies or playing games, limit visitors and phone calls in order to focus on the family. Doing these things will create a relaxed atmosphere in which kids may feel more comfortable about talking and asking questions.
-Let them know what to expect by explaining treatments and discussing how the parent may feel or act during treatments.
-Be sure all the kids know who will take care of them and the family’s life if a parent is hospitalized or too sick to carry on with daily activities.
-Plan activities away from the house with friends and family members on days when the sick parent is having a hard time.
Handling a tough challenge such as cancer together as a family is a hard battle, but will draw everyone closer and compassion is learned firsthand. Nobody would choose such, but since cancer is not a choice, it will best help the kids to have a positive attitude and go forth.